The girls and I at the wedding this weekend – how exquisite does my friend Kerenze, the bride, look? And we had SO MUCH FUN!
Hello friends, hope you’re having an awesome weekend! I’m just stopping by to let you know there’ll be no love list this weekend, because I am enjoying some much-needed long weekend down-time, and spending it with some very special friends. Starting with an amazing wedding I attended on Friday and carrying on today with one of my varsity girls out from SA with her hubby.
The wedding on Friday was, in fact, the sixth I’ve attended this year – and before you ask, because everyone does, they’re all friends (sadly this job doesn’t extend to me actually attending your weddings!). Two have been dear friends I met here through my publishing job, and four were at home, mostly with friends from my Stellenbosch days. Without exception, they have been absolutely wonderful. And they’ve also got me thinking about weddings in general.
Another question people often ask me is whether, when I attend a wedding, I’m ‘on duty’. In other words, am I totting up the pretty points for the decor, the design and the organisation? Easy answer: absolutely not. I mean, I’m probably noticing details more than most guests, in an appreciative way, but apart from that, I’m like any other guest. I get excited about buying my outfit and choosing a gift, I turn up full of butterflies to see the bride walk down the aisle, and I’m one of the last on the dancefloor. I couldn’t do what I do if I wasn’t a big softie romantic, so witnessing people I care about dedicate their lives to one another is always a very emotional experience, and it’s guaranteed if either of you get choked up in the vows or speeches that I’ll be reaching for a handkerchief. Sharing such a momentous moment in my friends’ lives is, on its own, a reason I love weddings.
But this year, if I’ve taken anything away from those I’ve attended, it’s been the aspect of community. Because as much as a big day is always about the bride and groom, at the end of the night, I won’t only remember how spectacular she looked, or how moved I was by what he said to her. I’ll also remember the new memories I made with old friends, and how that brought us together. The way we laughed together. The way I spun their giddy kids around the dancefloor, met new babies, got to know husbands and partners a bit better. The way I got to meet the other people in my friends’ lives – their parents and families, their best friends, their childhood buddies. Being at these events allows us to connect in a way that, especially for someone like me who lives far away from home, is so important. I’m so grateful for these opportunities to do so. I’m so sad I haven’t been able to go to every wedding I’ve been invited to over the years. I’m so hoping that, after the weddings are done, we find some other excuses to bring those we love together for a celebration (40th birthdays, anyone?). As a blogger, I am all about how to create a beautiful day, but as a friend and guest, I am all about experiencing it. And as readers, when you’re feeling at the end of your tether and worried that everything won’t be perfect, just remember that this is what will matter to your own guests too. Marrying your husband, and being together with your loved ones when you do it is the point. Don’t lose sight of it.